another fucking dead baby

We had our repeat ultrasound this morning - we should have seen something as R is 6w6d. If a sac were the golden standard, the we would be doing well. She does have a perfect looking sac. However there's not much in the sac. The fetal pole was barely visible - the RE said "I think this is it". There was no heartbeat. Who knows if what we saw last time was even the heartbeat. We only saw it for a few seconds last time, maybe it was one of R's blood vessels. There was nothing this time. We had a beta drawn this morning, we should have the results in the next 2 hours.

R's heart is breaking and I don't know what to do. This fucking sucks. 3 dead babies in the past 8 months plus the embryos that don't even stick in me. I'm sure if we were some uneducated, meth addicted couple we would have a healthy baby. But instead we just have dead ones. If we add up our 3 pregnancies (one was very short lived as it was more of a chemical pregnancy but they kept me on the PIO through 4w4d to confirm it with multiple betas) we've achieved 20w6d of pregnancy this year.