Today marks one week since coming home from the hospital. I had always heard that recovery from a c-section was tough but for me it's been really easy. I really haven't had any pain and other than taking ibuprofen once a day, I haven't taken any other pain meds. I'm grateful that my recovery has been so easy. While R is feeling better, she's in no position to take care of me and the baby full time while continuing her school work and growing our 2 other children (that last part is the most important). I'm doing well enough to take care of myself and the baby (with some help from R of course so that I can sleep) and do some light housework like dishes.
I've only been a parent for 8 days now and already I know that I'll be a much better pediatrician. I have all sorts of new empathy for my patient's parents. Like who the hell books newborn appointments for 8:50am. Our first doctor's appointment was at 1:30 pm and we barely made it - I can't imagine having that first appointment first thing in the morning. The first outing is a big deal - like why didn't I think of preparing the diaper bag more than 5 minutes before we had to walk out of the door and oh yeah, a blanket would be a good idea in the fall weather. There were so many little things i didn't think of until we had to leave.
The theme of this first week has been breastfeeding. Mr. Hudson is perfect in every way except for the fact that his suck, well it sucks. He's unable to effectively transfer milk from my breast to his mouth. He does a few good sucks and then just sits there with a mouth full of boob. The first few days I would spend the entire feed trying to piss him off to stay awake and attempt to feed. Feeding sessions took forever (at least an hour) and when we went to his first doctor's appointment he was 9% down. Yes, all babies lose weight but we worry when it's 8-10% down. So I upped my feeding efforts which were already pretty exhaustive. I woke him up to feed every 2 hours - that's 2 hours from start of feed to the start of the next feed, which means that there was very little down time in between feeds. I was certain he would have gained weight only to return to the doctor's office and find out he was now down 11%.
The next 24 hours proved to be quite stressful as I was feeding Hudson at the breast every 2 hours, then using the SNS to supplement with formula and then pumping. The next day I even fed him in my office before the appointment to plump him up. Luckily he had gained some weight but there's no way I could have continued those efforts. The nurse practitioner we saw also happened to be a lactation consultant and had a different strategy than what every other lactation consultant that I have ever worked with. Sensing my stress associated with feeds - she gave me permission to use bottles. I was very concerned about nipple confusion but she doesn't believe in it. I still have to put him to the breast often - even if it's not to feed but rather to hang out and have "breast time". The hope is that in a week or so he'll perk up and take to the breast. This new strategy has made a world of difference! My stress level is so much less and he's feeding so well. He does take the bottle but he's also taking the breast much better. This is another way in which I will be a better pediatrician - I have always known that breast feeding is hard. That although it's the "natural thing", it's something that both mom and baby have to learn. But OMG, it's so much harder than I thought it would be and while a baby losing weight is such a normal thing for me as a pediatrician but now I realize how stressful it is for the parent, especially to come back in day after day for weight checks. I'll still bring them back in for weight checks but I'll be nicer about it - LOL.
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11 comments:
I'm glad things are going so well. Recovery from c-sections was a piece of cake for me, too. Thankfully!!!
:)
I like what you said about this experience helping you be a better ped. That can be so grand for your patients! We have 4 kids but only once did I go to a ped who was not a parent, too. It was awful and miserable and I was the one who was making my child sick and he'd probably be better off with a different parent. UGH As a woman whose parents died when she was 11 years old, there was NO WAY IN HELL I was going to allow that doctor to talk to me like that - and no way in hell I was going to continue to allow my children to take his abuse. Because, that's exactly what I saw it as. Of course, throw in the fact that we were in Utah and were not a part of the popular religion there, and I was damned from the start...but, regardless, I'll never go to another ped who doesn't have children.
OMG sweetie the breastfeeding, ARGH! I tried with all three of mine, but the first two were 35-weekers and that made the sucking suck pretty much. One didn't figured it out and I pumped for six weeks and then in light of my diminishing supply and increasing stress levels, switched to formula only for the greater good. Especially since we have AB-whatchamacallit incompatibility issues which caused really bad jaundice in my kids that simply could NOT allow for them to have any less than we could cram into them, be it milk or formula. The second one did really well although the weight gain was a slow uphill battle, chunked up nicely, but then developed GI issues that forced us to go the formula route. My last one was so sick and threw up so much that at eight weeks the poor baby weighed not quite six pounds, after being seven pounds, one ounce at birth (and that was with SNS and bottles of breast milk and then variously-hydrolyzed formulas, and VERY close monitoring on our part and that of our pediatrician). Finally it turned out that that one had eosinophilic esophagitis, gastritis, etc. and had to have Neocate via first an NG and then a G-tube, ugh. But I did really try each time and it's one of the hardest things I've ever tackled, including my terminal degree! Sounds like you're doing a great job of balancing everyone's needs, and my one who breastfed the best also took a Soothie pacifier and Soothie bottles--my LC said that it would help improve the little bugger's oral tone and train the kid in the art of sucking, and it really helped--I successfully transitioned that one to breast only at three weeks of age and we did fine for the next three months until the GI issues popped up with all boob, all the time (literally--that kid nursed ALL THE DANG TIME). So I would highly recommend the Soothies as a supplemental bottle type and/or pacifier. In my experience they helped the kid's suck get stronger and didn't seem to confuse the baby one little bit. And good grief, light housework? I am in awe of you. Seriously. Wow.
PS...and you know what - as much as I loved our ped, I love her 10 times as much now that she has a child of her own. When she returned from leave my first question was "Well? How is it on the parent side of it?" She laughed and said "So much harder than I ever thought! I have a new respect for parents and I learned that I shouldn't give advice on what parents should do - it's all flying by the seat of your pants." I loved that she could admit that. :) So I'm in the camp of peds with kids make waaaaaay better peds! :)
It's really interesting to read your story because you're a first time mom and a pediatrician. I know how stressful it is when the baby isn't gaining weight like he should and I agree, the doctors can be a little more nice about it. Our doctor sucked and we loved the friendly approach of our midwives.
Breastfeeding is tough. I couldn't even get a latch out of Riley... It was stressful and tiring and I love the bottle. You do what you have to to stay sane. ;)
It's so funny to hear you say this. H and I have said it a couple of times now, that this experience will make you a better ped -- walking in your patient's shoes (or their parents) always does. And of course we think you are an amazing ped to begin with, there's nothing quite like experiencing new-parent panic yourself to make you respect your patients parents that much more.
You're doing fantastic - and Casey is so right -- so much of parenting is flying by the seat of your pants. And somehow you look back on that first year and wonder how the hell it went by so fast.
So glad to hear it's going okay for all three of you. He is sooooo cute and I hope it continues to get easier on you now that he's back to gaining weight. Being back in school again as a grad student has certainly helped me be a better teacher. And an appointment before 9am for a newborn? Pshaw...not going to happen. But you'll get it all sorted out soon and it won't take you 1/2 the day to get ready for a 1 hour event :-) Hope the milk keeps coming in, or that whatever feeding technique(s) you settle on do the job. Welcome back to blogworld :-)
How cute that this is a teaching experience. My ped. is unable to have kids. She had talked about adopting but doesn't have kids and I haven't nosed around to find out if she is still trying etc. I too feel that she would be a better doctor if she had kids. I love her dearly and would never switch for that reason...but I sometimes see frustration in her face at appointments when the kids aren't as cooperative as I know she'd like them to be and I want to laugh and say...You OBVIOUSLY have NO IDEA what it's like to deal with 3 kids at one time, let alone at a doctors appointment. ha ha ha
Breast feeding is NOT for sissy's. Everyone's experience is TOTALLY different...so please don't feel as if when someone tells you...it's easy..stick with it, it will get better...that it means it will be easy for you if you stick with it. It may be. It may not be.
You are doing the best thing for you and your baby and that is PERFECT !!!
Hudson is a doll ! I'm so happy for you both.
So glad he's feeding better. We went to the bottle rather early on since our boy wasn't seeming to get enough milk breastfeeding.
It does put things in perspective when you have this new little baby. I thought I was very smart and knew so much about life. Within 1 day of becoming a mommy, I realized how little I knew and how little control I had.
It's phenomenal. And quite scary.
Congrats.
breastfeeding is one of the hardest things i have ever done...even harder than giving birth imo. we had the weight gain issues too and had to supplement with formula for a few days. now our son is a breastfeeding champ and it was SO worth all the hard work, tears and stress we went through. reading your blog brings it all back to me though, and i still wonder today how i survived. our son is now 3.5 months old and i'm still on track for trying to keep going with breastfeeding for a year. good luck to you and hudson! :)
It sounds like you are doing really really well. Keep up the good work! How is your partner getting on?
Congrats again
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